About Moji…

Happy New Month Guys! May love help us see the miracles in each day.

You saw her at Ikeja City Mall in Ikeja, Lagos yesterday. At first, you couldn’t believe it was Moji. You did not want to go and meet her because you were afraid you would tap a stranger and the stranger might give you a bad eye instead of smile at you. You watched her as she walked with less grace than you remembered she had. It had been ten years since you last saw her, when you both graduated from London School of Econmics. You were very close and had plans for the future together. You were going to travel to Geneva. You were going to volunteer at Sierra Leone. You were going to do so many things together, some of which you cannot remember now, but you never got to do those things together. You did some of them alone and on that journey, met amazing people you made new plans with. One of them ended up as your husband and you told him about Moji.

You told him about the girl that always saw sunshine in everything. The girl you always found smiling even when she had reasons to cry. The girl that had a strong heart and encouraged you to try new things, challenge yourself. The girl that was always there to help you up and carry your burdens on her shoulder. She was so beautiful and she knew it and the boys did not let her rest about it but she never gave in to the many pressures that come with being pretty. She was the girl with the heart of gold whose laughter you still remember. You left school and you never heard from her again. She was not at her parents’ house. Her numbers were not going through and none of your friends knew about her whereabouts. You were very sad when you got married and she was not there because she often talked about how she would take all your wedding frustrations off your chest. You were sad when you touched your growing belly then and you knew the baby would not have Moji as his/her God mother. There were many defining moments in your life that you wished with all your heart that Moji would be there. Her words then helped you to go after the right and challenging things in life. You remember how elated, yet sad you felt when you started the charity organisation Moji made you adopt as one of your goals because it was one of her beautiful goals.

You finally summoned up the courage and you went to tap the person. The person turned and there was Moji, staring at you and screaming your name with joy. She had not forgotten, she had not forgotten how to scream your name the way she used to. People looked at you but you didn’t care. You pulled her into a tight embrace and a tear slipped from your eye. Your Moji was right in front of you but she looked different. The light that used to be in her eyes seemed bleaker. She had lost weight and you were shocked to see she had lost her laughter when she laughed. She left what she was going to buy and dragged you out of the store with her. ‘Ore, you look good,’ she said and you smiled. You both left the mall to your car, there you could have some silence and talk but you knew she did not really want to talk about her own life. She was more interested in talking about yours and you could not help but ask what had happened to her. She looked at you and tried to smile, the smile was very weak and she told you life tossed her so hard she forgot how to fight back. Life drained all the colours from her eyes and she thanked God for you that life has been kind to you. You smiled and showed her a picture of your child, Moji and she smiled so deeply, thanking you for naming your child after her.

You sit down now and think about it. About how funny life is. About how life has made Moji stop being Moji. She told you succinctly about the failures she encountered and how she forgot to get back up. How she forgot the words she drummed into your years back then that failure does not define you. You define you and you give failure the power to define you if you remain stuck and don’t move forward.  You remember how she always used to pray and make you pray to see the miracles in each day because each day is filled with miracles and most times, we are too occupied with thoughts about the past, now and the future to see the miracles we are surrounded by. You once asked her why she always smiled and she told you because smiling makes her pretty. You both laughed and she got serious. She told you smiling when it’s not working out is your way of telling God you trust him enough, you won’t fret because you know he has got you. She told you of how your smile might help people you don’t even know and how it will always help you. She begged you to love yourself when you were having a low self esteem. She reminded you of the fact that you are enough and you have to love yourself because you will always be with yourself and you seeing the good in yourself will allow you see the good in others.

You were used to her smiling at people and talking freely with people but there was a day inquisition took the better of you and you asked her why she talked to many people but was not close to many. She smiled and touched the left side of her chest – “My heart just like yours is very big. It can accommodate many people and it does but it is also wise and sensitive enough to filter the people it accommodates, leaving some at its door step and letting some fully in. It is wise enough to know the people it lets in can shape or mar the body and soul which it resides in”, she said. You asked how the heart will know the right people, “the heart always knows”, she replied. You remember ruminating over what she said that night and begging your heart to only let the right people in. She taught you so many things, things you now tell your child. Now, you hope and pray your little Moji does not outgrow sunshine and she does not allow life deal with her so much she forgets she is not a slave to life and it’s happenings.

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6 Comments
  • abey
    February 2, 2015

    This is wow!!! Love it!

  • frances
    February 2, 2015

    This is really beautiful Mayowa..
    I always pray most times too that nothing should ever change my smile.
    I lost it once before cuz I was naive and nothing is worth being sad anymore.
    May we always remember that we have sunshine in God.
    Happy new week.

  • Toyole
    February 2, 2015

    I like how you left me still wondering what Moji went through but yet with enough lessons to have me filling full. 🙂
    Does that make sense?

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