My Story by Ochuko.

I prayed to God to give me normal friends, but because God is very funny, he decided to laugh at me and give me the likes of Ochuko as friends. #sigh. If I start telling you about Ochuko ehn, we will sleep here. Just know he needs your prayers.  I am not even joking and no, Ochuko, you are not allowed to say I am making you look bad in public.

Anyway, beautiful souls. How are you? I hope you are having a good weekend and you are sleeping alot or not. So #OurStories Series continues with a very sensible article from Ochuko. He is a weird person who is having a negative influence on me by making me disturbingly weird. But I don’t know if I mind. I will stop talking now so you can read.

Read and learn people. Pastor Ochuko of the Most High is here to wake you up. Wake others up by sharing. Bless your hearts!

**

On the 15th of July, I finally did it, I finally went crazy. Well according to my mum, I’d finally confirmed her age long suspicion, that something was definitely wrong with me. I have been showing the signs for years and nobody but her could really see it, I wasn’t ready for Life (-__-)
 Originally, I had written about something else entirely, about one of the many challenges that God brought me through, but then I feel someone needs to hear this, also I happened to talk about this recently with a couple of students (and their parents).  see the post here

I’d start with this, most African parents do not readily talk with their children. There is a vast difference between talking WITH & talking TO your children. And it is not until the child monumentally messes up that they start to ask the questions that truly matter. “Tell us, how do you really feel?”, “What went wrong?”, “What can we do to make it better?” & the most important one, “What do you want?”

Where was I? Ah yes, madness. It has to be madness, to pick up the courage to tell your parents, something you’ve known since the second year of Medical School; “I did not want to practice Medicine for the rest of my life”. Yes o, it was madness, I mean after paying for 5 years of Medical school, the last thing you expect to hear from your child is “I’m not going back to Med School”.

The reality of the matter was I was tired and there was nothing you’d have said at that point, even now that’d make me change my stance on this matter. I’d like to say many things led to this eventual conclusion, things like The Russia/ Ukraine crises and the rising demands of med school but one thing I knew was I didn’t see myself practicing medicine for the better part of my life.

Well voices were raised, everybody was quiet for a while, prayers were held, family was involved, and when all efforts proved futile, negotiations began. The questions up there in paragraph 2 were employed. Long story short, we came to an understanding, some later than others of course, compromises were made. I got closer to both of my parents.

If you’re wondering how this story ends, well in June, I’d be in 3rd year Biochemistry at the Benson Idahosa University. Yes the “where would you work?” question was asked and no I won’t tell you by whom . That’s for me to know and for you to find out much much later. What have I learnt from this experience? 3 years is a long time to be unhappy, please talk to people, let them know how you really feel.

I realize not all parents would have swallowed this as well as mine did but at the end of the day, you alone have to live with the consequences of your decisions/ indecisions. So choose you this day, who you shall embrace for the rest of your life: The Happy You or The Other Guy. 

I remain

Ochuko A. Akpomudjere

Have you read my book, It’s Your Life To Lead? Check it here
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3 Comments
  • aj black
    March 28, 2016

    Ochuko, I seriously think you are a disturbed and disturbing fellow (my sympathies to Mayowa)!

    The first thing is you are strong (synonym-crazy). The second is that you are blessed with very special people as parents- I’m not forgetting how long it took them to come to an accommodation.

    I have seen so many instances of cases similar to yours. In a lot of them, the parents kept pushing and prodding and should the child somehow find a voice and a little spine, heaven is invoked, Ephesians is selectively quoted and, “If you dare … consider yourself no longer a child of mine” is pronounced to the hearing of the aunts and uncles. Then, the screams of “Abomination!” “Do you understand the implication of what you have made your father do?” “And your poor mother! Do you want to kill the poor woman, you heartless child?” The child is broken, the little voice is lost, the spine totally blown away. The aunts and uncles now advise the child to, “Go and beg your father for terrible curses follow these pronouncements if not quickly rescinded!” The rest of course is obvious…

    Like you said, most of our parents haven’t the slightest clue about parent-child communication. And it is essential that they be educated.

    • Oluwamayowa Depo Oyedokun
      April 1, 2016

      Lmao. I love your reply. I really do.

      Thank you so much for reading. Please join me in praying for Ochucko. Lol!

  • Frances Okoro
    April 4, 2016

    Bold. Scary. But bold again.
    Life’s too short to live with dissatisfaction for where we are/with who we are but fears always seem valid.
    It definitely wasn’t easy(i can only speak from what I perceive, haven’t quite had an experience like this or maybe I have, what with God calling me elsewhere from using my wig and gown which I know how much my dad did to get me to have it…)
    But again, bold. Scary. But bold.

    Thanks for sharing.
    Lots of lessons to be learnt from this.

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