Now, on to the post…
For a long time, I was a strong advocate of the saying “WE HAVE CHOICES. LIFE IS ABOUT THE CHOICES WE MAKE AND NOT NECESSARILY WHAT HAPPENS TO US. HORRIBLE THINGS CAN HAPPEN TO US. HORRIBLE THINGS CAN HAPPEN TO YOU BUT YOU CAN CHOOSE TO LOOK BEYOND THAT AND MOVE FORWARD”. I am still an advocate of that saying and similar sayings about you being in control of your life and emotions but I’m afraid I am not as strong an advocate as I was.
I have always known making choices can be so difficult and atimes, it’s a blessing when you have no choice but I still preached/preach about you having free will and as a result of your free will, you have choices. I believe even God gives us choices. He gives us the choice of accepting or not accepting his gift of salvation although for me, I have no choice in that aspect. I am not crazy enough to pass on the best gift ever which is the gift of salvation. You’d be crazy to turn it down as well.
….. and now, I’m diverting..
A friend and I were talking some days back and he mentioned that he wasn’t happy. The motivational writer and speaker in me went all ‘no one except you is responsible for your happiness. You choose to be happy. It is a choice’, I said borrowing the words of some great philosophers who like I was are very strong advocates for us having choices. He told me, ‘I know but it’s not as easy as you are making it sound’. I don’t think I let him land before I said; ‘yeah I know it is difficult but it’s a choice and it’s not impossible’.
Long and short of the story is, he made me really understand that this choice thing is not close to being as easy as we make it sound. Even for happiness being a choice, he made me realize that happiness is much linked to the people in your life and the circumstances you are going through. According to him, because of the search for happiness, some drink heavily, go on meaningless sex spree, stay in abusive relationships and so on all because they are trying to attain the state of happiness. Happiness as a choice can be really difficult. It made me remember something Lucas Scott (not sure he was the one that said it) said one time in One tree hill. He said: ‘happiness is not a destination’ or something like that and since I heard that, I sat down to think about it and I concluded happiness doesn’t always come. I still hold on to that conclusion because there are times you are just unhappy and you can’t it. But like I wrote in my book, ‘it’s your life to lead’ which is still in the process of publication, daily happiness is achievable if you choose to be happy and going with that choice requires a lot of practice.
I do know like my friend pointed out that it is easier when you have such amazing people in your life that push and support you. One thing I am sure of though is the Joy that comes from having a working relationship with Jesus and not just being merely religious. That joy resides inside of you and lightens up your whole being. There is this friend of mine who is always happy, always smiling and you can clearly see the joy in her soul because of her relationship with God. I am still getting there.
I think this post should be under ramblings because I’m not even sure I am making sense. If you don’t get anything from this article, please understand that indeed you always have a choice although some choices are easier to make than some others and there are times it feels like you are left with no choice. You do have a choice.
Most importantly, determine to keep pushing no matter what, even when it seems like it won’t work out. Life really is about the choices you make and darling, don’t because of your pursuit of happiness accept abuse or friends that belittle you. You have to surround yourself with positive thinking people, they will help you in making the right choice. Finally, make the choice to walk with God. I know it is not easy because it involves dying to self so you can live with God but trust me, it’s one of the best things that can happen to you. May God help us.
Stay beautiful hon, have a good night rest and never forget, you always have a choice.0